Disaster Date

Dear Future First Husband, I must tell you about my date from this weekend. If you turn out to be this guy, you must have drugged and then brain washed me into not only seeing you again, but marrying you as well.  Preface: I met the guy about 3 weeks ago at a birthday party I was at. We talked for a while at the bar... he's friends with mutual friends. I hear he's nice/great guy/etc, so when he gets my phone number I think why the heck not. Everyone once in a while I do like the attention from the male gender... I also like free dinners and drinks. Calls me several times the next week or so and wants to "hang out". Excuse me? You don't ask a girl to "hang out" you ask her to dinner. I decided until he asked me to dinner I was going to make excuses why I could see him. I don't settle for anything less. The date: He calls me that night and asks me where I want to go. I get to pick? Excellent on the fact that I got to go to Tillman's, pathetic on the fact that the guy couldn't make a decision on where to take me. That's not a good sign. I like a guy to take control and let ME know where we are going. Not vice versa. Grow some balls.  He picks me up and we head to Tillman's. He didn't get his car washed and it was junked out with all sorts of stuff. I think I saw a small life raft and a mannequin back there. Seriously. Come on... first dates are about putting your best foot forward and his best foot was buried in the piles of crap in that Tahoe. Also the one of the headlights kept popping out and he had to get out and pop it back in. Hello! Precious Cargo (aka me) was in that car!  We get to the restaurant and I ask him the prerequisite questions... about his job, family, school etc. Here's a brief re-cap of what I got.  1. His job. He's a lawyer (strike one) that works freelance (strike two) and if you want to know how much he makes in a year feel free to ask me cause he actually told me (strike three.) 2. His family. He has three older sister and an older brother. They are all 2 years apart. He will not tell me his age, just that "he's 2 years younger than his 40 year old brother, so I should be able to figure out the math." Ummm... so you're 38? Maybe? And you won't tell me because.... I ask him about his sisters and if they have kids, etc. He actually says he doesn't know. He doesn't know if his sisters are even married or WHAT STATE THEY LIVE IN because he hasn't talked to them in TWENTY YEARS. I didn't want to pry, but I had to ask if they had a falling out... nope, they just never had much in common and lost touch. HUH? My brother likes hunting and being outside and we still talk to each other.  3. The fact he won't tell me his age freaked me out enough... 38 is a little too old for me anyway... 4. I couldn't really look at him at dinner. He was cuter than I remembered from the night I met him, but only when he kept his mouth shut. Something about his teeth bothered me. They were short and pointy and I don't date vampires.  After dinner we go back to his place for a glass of wine before we head to meet some of his friends. BIG mistake bringing me there. Here's a brief recap of his apartment: 1. It's in the ghettoooooo. (Insert song here.) Seriously. Chipping stucco, roof tiles falling off, gunshots in the window kind of ghetto.  2. Well, okay, maybe the inside is better... I've seen people turn crappy places into a cute nice place to live. No such luck. His sofa looked like it came from the curb on large item pick up day... ten years ago. I have to sit around stains the size of Texas. There is also a nice fish tank... empty but dirty... and papers laying everywhere. As I sit down and sip my wine, I notice something dart out of the corner of the room....  3. ... it was a cat... no, not just one cat but TWO cats! (Surprisingly, the apartment did not have a foul odor often associated with felines and little boxes.) I was wearing black pants. One of the cats was white. Gross. 4. He did have a flatscreen the size of the jumbo screens at Cowboys Stadium. I see he has his priorities in order.  We leave and go meet his friends... turns out I know most, if not all, of them. Why did they not warn me! As the date ends I'm already pretty sure I will not be going out with him again... but no... he has different ideas.  The aftermath: Saturday I go to a party for my aunt. I do not tell him what time the party way or when I would be home. He had no reason to know. He calls me about 8 and I was with a friend having dinner. I do not answer my phone when I'm with others, so I silenced the call. He wasn't going to be ignored. I get a text asking what I'm doing and how the party is. 1. Why are you calling me if you think I'm at a party for my aunt. 2. I WOULD have called you back had you not phone stalked me. I replied back that I was at dinner and couldn't talk to him. Yes, I did make it look like I was on a date. He needs to know that I am a hot commodity.  Sunday I go to watch the Cowboy game with another friend. Calls again. Once more, I was with a friend and didn't answer... no worries. He sends some more texts. In the course of the next hour he proceeds to tell me the whole game play by play. Excuse me, but I did let him know I was watching the game... not sure why I got running commentary while I was sitting in a feline free environment with a TV 10 feet from me. I finally replied "yes, we are watching the game, I've seen all this." No more texts. I thought I had gotten rid of him, but his persistence is like the heat this summer. Monday. I have calligraphy class. He calls me in the middle of class and you guessed it... texts me right after the call. I tell him I'm busy and we would have to catch up later.  Tuesday. I have committee meetings and kickball. He calls me... texts me... I, again, tell him I'm busy and we will catch up later.  It's Wednesday night now and I haven't heard from him yet... and I'm THRILLED!  I'm sorry, but when did going on one date with a girl mean that you have to call her every single day? If he's acting like this now, what in the world is he going to do when I date other people at the same time as him? Kill those guys?!  ... I guess I just need to be upfront and tell the guy that I don't mind going out every once in a while but I'm not interested in getting serious with anyone (or maybe just him) and during the week (and weekends) I'm busy and don't have time/energy/desire to tell someone a recap of my day. Or maybe something like that but nicer.  Am I crazy that I'm freaked out?!!?